I am not one to be on the phone other than acknowledging appointments . . . or if I recognize the number of a family member. The computerized calls are awful. They don’t honor holidays or Sundays. We do not answer them. Thankfully, someone who does need to get ahold of us will leave a message. If I hear a message beginning, I will pick up the phone and thank them for being patient in me getting to the phone.
Last night the phone rang and it was a number both Dennis and I know. It was aunt Lorraine in Arizona. She was having a very bad day. Due to eye problems that cannot be corrected with lenses, she had to give up her driving that day. Lorraine is 87 and comes to see us every summer and stays for several days. She has been able to use a car of one of the kids to motor around Minnesota. That was until last year when neither of her kids offered a car and Dennis and I didn’t question it. We picked up Lorraine at Chris’ and delivered her to Mark after our visit. Lorraine’s son, Mark, lives in Hastings. Daughter Chris lives in Lakefield. We visited for almost an hour last night and it gave her a chance to vent and share. What more could I do than give her positive support. No one likes change.
I have no doubt this will be a challenge for Lorraine. Who wouldn’t want to remain mobile at will. It wasn’t Lorraine who finally made the decision. That made it hurt a bit more.
Dennis and I talked about when Mom gave up driving. One day out of the blue, she told us that her car was going out to Michael’s for them to use and that was that. She was living in an apartment house in Hutchinson at the time. She had realized many of her friends in Park Apartments used the city transport. There was no moving the car when it snowed and all she needed was to step out the front door and she could continue doing errands. I believe Mom was 88 or 89 when she let the car keys go. Come to think of it, that is exactly the same way Mom decided to move off of the farm and take that apartment in Hutchinson. We all came for a Mother’s Day and she made her announcement. She perhaps knew in her heart what her limit was with what had been usual and customary all of her life. She was a trooper.
I admit I don’t drive as much as I used to when I was working or when Megan and Nicholas were small and I would travel to the metro to help out when needed. It’s one thing to only drive once in a while compared to not being able to drive that “once in a while.” Actually, tomorrow is my “once in a while” to do some banking and grocery shopping here in town. Snow is forecast and I hope to be ahead of it. I don’t drive at night. My depth perception is not good. Car lights, reflective road signs all have a halo around them and it is quite difficult to remain focused. If I can’t get my crap together and get it done in daylight, it must not be very important. In the recent past, Dennis has even commented that if we go somewhere, he would like to be home before it gets dark. For us older ones . . . smart move. Yup, we continue to get smart to protect what we have for a wonderful life right here on Stauffer Avenue.